February 2012
9 posts
January 2012
29 posts
just a kerfuffle of screwed up genes.
I think it’s rather silly to say, or rather to admit, that Tyler and I would spend countless times, uselessly arguing over who Matheson was more genetically similar to. Yes, it is true, Matheson is 50/50, and biologically speaking, I did not reproduce by giving him 70% of his genetic composition while Tyler only contributed 30% because, alas, that is, to a degree of fault, impossible....
“Why don’t you be the artist and make me out of clay? Why don’t you...”
“I love you, don’t you see? You stole my heart in 1, 2, 3; you stole my...”
I hope everything’s well and you live a good life; I hope everything’s well and you find a good wife; I hope everything’s well and the sun shines for you, but I’m packing my things and I’m taking my son, just don’t worry, hun, because we’re going home <3
“Teen fathers aren’t known for intelligence.”
Sometimes I wish you were dead. A lot of the times I wish you were dead. Then I reevaluate my wishes because I realize that people would be very unhappy if I had to go to jail for a few decades for killing you.
what words cannot express..
Not too long ago, when I thought I knew everything in the world, I stuck my head in books, drowning out my thoughts with the words of other people. I lost myself reading fictional stories of faith and love to forgive the people who hurt me. I indulged myself with essays and philosophies to understand the people who hurt me. I drowned myself in novelettes of childish fiction to forget the people...
Regret.
Would you like to know the scariest part of my failure? Three years ago from this day, I broke down and no one knew. Three years ago from today, I sat in my bathroom for six hours debating suicide…. I almost did it. No one knew. Not until 2 and a half years later when I decided to confess to my mom. January 11, 2009; Matheson saved my life before he was born.
Turns out he loves me not, he's the last petal on...
I’ve been told I’m being selfish; Insinuated that I’m satisfying my own personal vendetta and that I’m taking actions for no one but myself.
I’m dealing with what feels like a hungry pack of care-free idiots except it’s just one with a magnitude of many.
Today, I was carrying matheson down the stairs because he wanted to come with me to get his milk. I had...
bad dreams
6/366….that’s it. that’s all it is. I had a nightmare while having a nap and woke up in a cold sweat this afternoon. It was terribly vivid and I don’t think there’s anything worse than when you remember any forms of numbers and texts written in your dreams because sometimes that makes it realer than it seems.
Karma? a bitch? No way.
Karma’s been good to me, very good to me. And to those that have done me wrong, well, Lady Fortuna’s been coasting by my side for years and crushing the souls of my enemies. Sometimes I feel like a downcast gypsy, but whatever the case, when someone does something way out of line and more so treacherous than anything else, fate just has an inconspicuous way with fucking up there lives....
I was asked for advice - no names, just...
Sometimes you forget about it because you push it so far back.. But then one slight of the finger could pull the trigger and allow you to remember the things you chose to forget…
Love cannot prepare you for the obstacle you’re about to face—that’s what experience is for.
So I told him…
“A word of advice you might like to consider though.. When you follow your...
“I just wanted to say I love you, good night.”
7 tags
I'm not happy, but the little things make this...
Day 3 of 2012: Positives - Matheson learned how to read a little bit more progressively than he usually does during his attempts at reading. Identifying letters with a little more accuracy when in random order and even counting how many there are of each particular letter in a sequence of letters were certainly some of the more outstanding things he’s done with enhancing his reading skills....
“I’m looking, I’m looking and I won’t give up, nothing’s...”
– Care Bears
Sleepless nights
My greatest fear is giving Matheson a justified reason to believe he has the worst parents ever. Sometimes I get too afraid to admit that we’re falling short of being the very worst, but cutting it too damn close.
Then I tell myself things will never be the way I want them to be or dreamed them to be and I just have to roll with the punches. So I deal.
Some force of divinity gave this to...
"luv" swag.
Guy: what did you do for new years :O
Girl: Idk partied, got drunk, met a cute guy, got horny, felt guilty, went home alone, masturbated? You?
Lmfao
I expect you to be better..
Two thousand and twelve. You are going to be everything I look for in a “good year”. You’re going to be what I make you and I will make you a better year. Better than 2011, mark my words. It is the second day of the year and I’ve decided to make a daily tumblr record of the things that make each day exceptional because instead of complaining and bitching about all the...
December 2011
30 posts
He's so beautiful.
Either I have one of the most brilliant little boys ever or there’s some intense bond between Matheson and I that allows us to understand each other so well, but today proved to be one of the most incredibly emotional experiences I’ve ever had with my son. Today, as I was having my nap, Matheson wasn’t tired, yet lay beside me in our bed. He let me sleep for three hours while...
